Maggie Makes Four!

This journal started off documenting the adoption of our youngest daughter. It now follows the twist and turns of our lives as we raise these two amazing little creatures into the best women they can become.

Tuesday, September 26, 2006


"Look at me! Mommy gave me bangs!" Just in time for school pictures, I cut bangs into Maggie's hair. To make the picture complete, Maggie fell down tonight and bruised her cheek. Posted by Picasa

More blurbs!

Ok, my life is out of control and I just don't have time or inspiration to write anything long...here's a few reasons why.

La Nina is making 85 trips a day to the front porch to check the status of her Halloween Costume. I even showed her the tracking on the Fed Ex web site to prove its on the way and will be here THURSDAY. However, this doesn't deter her from the vigil. Now, at 5:30am, every morning, I'm awoken to the sweet question, "Is it Thursday?" What am I going to do when it is Thursday and she has to leave the house because Mommy is going to work?

I also couldn't get La Nina into soccer. The classes for her age group were completely booked. When I broke the news to her, she rounded her shoulders and asked, "Does this mean I don't get the shoes?" I'm telling you, she has no interest in soccer...she just wants those pink kleats.

On the other hand, Maggie loves soccer. This is the first time she has something truly her own. At her 'practice' on Saturday, she wouldn't do any drill that didn't involve the ball. So, her Dad wisely just let her dribble the ball everywhere she went. We've also figured out that 'Mommy and Me' soccer works better when its 'Daddy and Me.' If I go on the field with her, she just buries her face in my leg. If Daddy's out there, she just wants the ball. Go figure.

Another little bit of Maggie news to report: Today at 9:42 am, Maggie strapped herself into her carseat. I'm telling you of all the firsts I've seen my kids do, those car seat firsts are big. In my books this 'first' beats walking (the mixed blessing first) and is a close second to talking (I love the talking, but there are days..). I'm counting the weeks until she can release herself from the car seat. When I lose my status as official strapper and unstrapper, it will be a red letter day.

We had the carpets cleaned today for the first time since my pre-travel for Maggie cleaning frenzy. The last time we had carpets cleaned, I remember thinking it was going to be 'awhile' before we did them again...and it was... for good reason. The girls and I had to leave the house at 9:45am and couldn't return until 7pm. We went to Maggie's gymnastics, Chinatown in Oakland, did a couple of errands, went to the Library and went to dinner. When we got home, we were all exhausted. Perhaps this is why I'm uninspired to write this evening.

Friday, September 22, 2006

Etc., Etc., Etc.

Just winding down after a very crazy week. Two stories due, a 14-hour work day on my project AND a really bad cold. I'm just so glad the work and the cold are behind me for the weekend.

A few updates:

  • Maggie's Gymnastic Class: Well, that old Romanian gymnastic teacher certainly knew how to shape up her class. After tears a week ago and a threat of kicking the kid out, the child from my last post returned to class and behaved like an angel. The Mom said her tears were related to frustration because her daughter was so difficult, but that her daughter was upset over the time out at Gymnastics that she had been a different kid all week. It certainly showed in class.
  • La Nina is now tempted to play soccer. After watching her sister last weekend, she's expressed an interest to give the old soccer ball a try. Of course, she's still concerned about getting sweaty, but the pink kleats are going to be the hook. We'll find out if there's an opening for her tomorrow.
  • I didn't have much time to write about what it took to get the picture with Norman (posted below). But imagine the worst princess line in Disneyland and you'll have an idea. It was great to go to the picnic, meet up with many of our friends, introduce La Nina to Norman (Maggie too, but she doesn't get it yet) and meet a few bloggers to boot. Definitely a fun day for all.
  • Because of work commitments this week the girls spent the night with Nana and Papa for the first time. They did great and keep asking when they get to go back. They especially liked sitting in the "Big Chairs watching Mary Poppins" before bed. In fact, they've suggested that becomes part of our bed time ritual. I told them we don't have "Big Chairs" so it wasn't possible, La Nina informed me we could buy "Big Chairs" at a store.
  • We ordered Halloween Costumes for the kids this week and La Nina keeping vigil hourly waiting for the box to arrive. This is the first time she's gotten that boxes on the porch have good things in them. I don't know how we'll manage Santa this year, 'cuz she's onto us.

That's it for now. Hope you had a great week.

Sunday, September 17, 2006


It took a rare appearance from Norman to get us to the Accept Picnic. Here we are in the US with the MAN of Chinese adoption. Posted by Picasa

Saturday, September 16, 2006

The REAL reason kids are over-committed

Ok, I swore I would keep a lid on my kids activities, but Maggie is quickly becoming the over-committed child. Here's how it happened: La Nina does gymnastics, Maggie wants to do gymnastics. La Nina does a dance class Maggie wants to do a dance class. Then, out of no where, Maggie starts begging to play soccer. As a long-time player and fan of the sport, I'm thrilled, so naturally, I sign her up for our local "Kids Love Soccer" program.

Tonight we asked her what she liked best. Her answer: "Soccer, Mom. I like to kick the ball!"

"Mom, can I play soccer dressed like this?" Posted by Picasa

"Ok, Mom, you figured out the clothes and got me to the field on time, but where's the ball? I really want to kick it." Posted by Picasa

She shoots, she scores! Maggie makes a goal at her first ever soccer "practice". Posted by Picasa

Friday, September 15, 2006

The Ghost of Immelda is Alive and Well

I'm here to report the ghost of Immelda Marcos is alive and well and dwells in my four-year-old.

Here's the most recent siting: At the mall, yesterday. I was trying to buy the girls a couple of cute matching shirts to wear to an event on Sunday. I don't often dress my kids to match, but we're going to a picnic with our agency and it's easier to spot my kids in a crowd if they're dressed alike. So, damn me for artificially "twinning" my girls in front of those social workers, but hey, all is fair in the execution of parental duties. However, I digress...just suffice to say, shoes were not on my shopping list.

Of course, we go into the Gap store at the local mall and happily find that it's mark down day. It was better than free ice cream on a hot day. La Nina decided my moment of distraction was the perfect time for a little shopping of her own. A few minutes go by and she appears holding a pair of shoes. Just between you and me, they were cute. Brown, sort of Mary Jane with a strappy sandal twist at the back. They were in her size, but they were $25.99 MARKED DOWN!

I calmly explained 'we weren't looking for shoes, but shirts and gee, honey, don't you just love this darling navy polo. It's just your size. ' She wasn't buying anything I had to sell and was intent on those damn shoes.

"Mom, I need these. I don't have any brown shoes," she countered.

"Honey, we're not getting shoes today. Last time we were at the mall you got two pairs, and those won't work for winter time. Sorry, but no."

"Aww...Mom. Please."

"Sorry, honey. No. You need to put them back now."

I go back to shopping. I've dispensed my parental command and it's mark down day! Wahoo! I have a good kid. She'll listen to me. I didn't think about the incident again, until a few minutes later, I spot La Nina and the shoes are still clutched in her fists.

"La Nina, put them back. We're not getting them."

Then she did it. She looked me in the eye, spun on her heal and marched to the counter to buy the damn shoes. Like she knows what the heck she is doing. Like she can even see over the counter. Like she has money!!! I'm thinking all of this and marveling at her guts. I'm also absolutely furious. But we're in a crowded store and I'm holding the trump card...or credit card, as the case may be. So, I know her mutiny is going nowhere.

So, the cashier looks her and asks, "Do you want to try these on honey?"

"No, I just want them," she answers.

About then I intervened "I'm sorry. We're not getting that today." The cashier peers over the cash register at La Nina and shrugs her shoulders. La Nina hangs her head in defeat.

My shopping expedition cut short by an act of grave rebellion, I hand the cashier the things I've gathered, pay and march Immelda and her sister from the store. I took away a few privileges and we discussed the virtues of minding your mother.

Here's my real worry. She's got half the buying experience down. And she's four. Heaven forbid she ever get a grandfather in a shoe store alone. 'Cuz they have the 'trump' cards too, and in that case, Immelda will reign supreme.

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Gymnastics

Today, at Maggie's gymnastics class something happened that left me with very mixed emotions. The gymnastic facility I take the girls to is fairly hardcore. The kids are on real equipment, doing real gymnastics. My kids love it, so it works for us, but clearly, this is not for everyone.

The same gal teaches both La Nina's and Maggie's class. She hails from an Eastern Block country known for its deep gymnastic tradition and with arms like hers, it's safe to assume she competed. She also demands the kids listen to her. It's a safety issue, she explains to kids and parents at the beginning of each 8 week session. Gymnastics is dangerous and following your teacher's instructions will keep kids safe. She is no nonsense about safety, it's one of the things I like about her.

So, today, in Maggie's class of three year olds, two of the kids were not listening. I mean, really not listening. In their defense, they are three. It's tough to listen to a teacher explain an obstacle course when all you want to do is try it out. The expectation is that the kids will wait through the explanation, then have a chance to do their thing on the equipment.

These two imps were climbing on stuff not on the course, throwing things at each other, running wild. Luckily, it wasn't Maggie. So, the teacher fashioned a time out for the kids. She made the kids sit and watch class until they proved they could listen. One of the kids figured it out quickly, sat still and earned his way back into class. The other girl did not. It was so sad. This little girl truly didn't understand what she was doing wrong. She kept getting up, trying to get on a balance beam (thinking it was her turn) and the teacher stuck to her guns and put her back against the wall. Eventually, the little girl was upset, the Mom was upset, but the coach just kept the class rolling.

At the end of class, the coach told the girl, if she didn't behave next week, she was out of the class. Then, she told the Mom, it wasn't fair to the other children for her daughter to require so much attention. She basically said, your daughter isn't ready for this and the Mom started crying. YIKES!

While on the one hand, I'm grateful that the teacher is so no-nonsense, because let me tell you, the other kids were all eyes on this one girl. And the ones in class were really paying attention to the teacher. On the other hand, THEY'RE 3! In Maggie's case, not quite 3. Shouldn't it be a more than 1 strike policy? I have to admit, this isn't the first time that little girl had a tough time in class. It just left me feeling sad for the rest of the day. And maybe a little lucky too. My kids do tend to listen to others (not me, of course!). How would I have felt if I were that Mom? Hard to say, but I bet I wouldn't be back at gymnastics next week, and I probably wouldn't recommend it to my friends either.

Sunday, September 10, 2006

Daddy Rocks! Mommy Writes!

Well, well, well. It appears the old Dad around here has a few tricks up his sleeves. I was gone two nights and returned today to find the kids well-fed, clean and dress appropriately for the weather. The house was also clean. The dishes were done and the laundry that had been in the washer when I left somehow made it to the drier. Of course, I couldn't be happier that things went smoothly while I was gone. I want everyone to do well without me, because that means I may get to do this sometime again.
**************************************************************************************
My conference was good. Of course, I am one of those people who likes to yack, listen and learn about writing. There were two tracks at the conference: A track for people who just want to write and a track for people who are actively trying to sell something they've written. Since I don't have any fiction worthy of being sold, I was on the mechanics track. The workshops were all taught by writers and more writers spoke at every meal. After two solid days of talking about writing, I'm tired and my mind is just spinning. It seems so easy to write, and it is: You just sit in front of a key board and start. Yet, some how, these people filled two days of workshops on that process and now I'm not sure where to start. Funny, how over-complicated the simplest things can become.
*************************************************************************************
I uncovered a serious problem with my education while at this writing conference: Somehow I successfully avoided reading many, many classics. It's embarrassing! Here I am in Steinbeck country and the only Steinbeck I ever attempted to read was Grapes of Wrath. And that was as an adult. I don't think I ever finished it. I also never finished the Great Gatsby, anything by Joyce, Melville or Twain. I started many of the books, but ended up with the cliff notes and a gift for b.s.'ing my way through the tests.

Now, many, many years after my formal education has ended, I go to a writer's conference and it's just assumed I've read these masterpieces. Past sins come back to haunt me yet again! Before you think I'm the most poorly read writer ever, I have read a number of books by Hemingway, Salinger, Emerson, Bronson, Austen and Plath...all as an adult. So, I left the writing conference not only with a desire to get some serious writing done, but with a really long reading list that probably should have been completed years ago. Any one else out there care to confess a few literary sins? I'm picking up East of Eden tomorrow...and you?

Thursday, September 07, 2006

When Mommy's Away...

This weekend, I'm taking a few days off from the family to attend a writing conference in Salinas. (Laugh if you must, but Steinbeck did hail from that area.) I haven't been away from the family since we adopted Maggie almost two years ago. I'm glad I've taken my time on this as I feel like now the girls are really ready to stay with Daddy. And more importantly, he's ready to stay alone with them.

I have only one worry, ok, may be two worries. Worry Number One: Do you think the Dad will remember to feed the kids? I worry about this. He sometimes forgets to feed himself. I plan to stock the kids drawer in the refrigerator with lots of healthy food and the kids can open the refrigerator and help themselves, so they won't starve. Plus I bought some lunchables so all he has to do is open a container...yet, I worry.

Worry Number Two: The Magster's Hair. The Magster doesn't have bangs, because every day I put a ponytail in her hair. Now I have to admit that putting a ponytail in the Magster's hair is a bit like...well, roping a bucking bronco. She's a moving target. The Dad doesn't even attempt her hair on most occasions. He'll fix La Nina's hair, because she'll stand still and help him. The Magster doesn't believe cooperation is necessary when it comes to having her hair done. One day, he actually let La Nina do Maggie's hair. It wasn't pretty. So, I worry the poor Magster will run around all weekend with her hair in her eyes.

So, while I'm taking workshops on dialogue, point of view, voice and plot--I know, I'm a geek-- I'll hopefully not be too worried that my kids are running around hungry with really bad hair. And if you see them around town, please remind my husband to feed the kids and if you have a barrett in your pocket, can you stick it in Maggie's hair?

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Daddy Sick, Mommy Sick

When Daddy's sick he goes to bed at 3pm. La Nina brings him water and demands Mommy get him "Tywenol".

When Mommy's sick, she makes dinner.

When Daddy's sick, he lays around in his sweats in the bedroom with the door locked for peace and quiet.

When Mommy's sick, Daddy locks his office door to take a conference call that sounds an awful lot like a discussion of the results of fantasy football.

When Daddy's sick, the Magster demands his temperature be taken every hour on the hour.

When Mommy's sick, the Magster demands crackers and juice.

It's a good thing Mommy doesn't get sick.

Friday, September 01, 2006

Dance Lessons

Scene: Harried, mini-van driving Mom dashes into the dance studio where her daughters' are enrolled for lessons. She has just read that there is a dress code for the classes and she's trying to figure out if her daughters' really need the proper leotards for a once a week tap and ballet class.

"May I help you?" asks the peppy teenage clerk.

"Ummm..my daughters are taking lessons here and I just read in the parent handbook they are supposed to wear color coded leotard based on their class level."

"Yes, that is correct. How old are your daughters, ma'am?"

The Mom, stifling anger at the ma'am comment, answers, "Four and a half and almost three."

"Well, you have a Twinkle Star, she should be in Lilac. And a Twinkle Baby, who should be in pink," answered the clerk. She's a little too perky for the Mom's taste.

"Does it really matter?" asks the Mom. "I've already bought them both tap shoes and ballet shoes, do they really need to have special leotards?" The mom is thinking, 'oh c'mon...I'm already out $70 for shoes, not to mention the monthly class fees for two kids, now they're going to fleece me on the leotards? What if they don't last past the end of September in these classes?'

"Oh yes. It's important that your daughters feel part of their class. It's a real connection point for the girls. Sort of like a team uniform. When they move up in class and change their color, it gives them an important sense of accomplishment," the clerk explains as she removes the three styles of leotards from the case. "You can choose from capped sleeve, tank or spaghetti straps in both colors."

"I guess I'll take a small pink tank, and a medium lilac spaghetti," answer the Mom, who is already reaching for her credit card. Oh...why did I sign them up for that Princess Dance Camp this Summer? What was I thinking? the Mom silently wonders.

The girl neatly folds the leotards and begins entering the Mom's name into her computer. She rings up the leotards and turns to the Mom. "Anything else? Are they new to dance? Do you have shoes?"

"Yes, I have shoes," the Mom answers, almost sarcastically.

"Do they have the skirts in these colors?"

"Skirts?"

"Oh, they have to have skirts, for when they twirl." said the girl. Before the Mom can even open her mouth the girl adds a lilac and pink skirt to the pile and gives the Mom a total. "That will be a lot of money now," the girl says with a smile.

The Mom hands over her credit card and takes the bag of dance clothes. As she turns to leave the shop, the girl calls out, "And don't forget, our winter leotards will come in around Oct. 1. Your girls will need the long sleeve versions and tights too."

The mother roles her eyes and wonders what ever happened to taking dance lessons in shorts and a t-shirt. As she opens the door to leave, another Mom clutching the Parent Handbook enters and she hears her say, "My daughter just started lessons here, and the handbook says...."