tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-85580902024-03-13T09:07:54.178-07:00Maggie Makes Four!This journal started off documenting the adoption of our youngest daughter. It now follows the twist and turns of our lives as we raise these two amazing little creatures into the best women they can become.One Lucky Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05746848519653479448noreply@blogger.comBlogger828125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8558090.post-10621635634419884622012-04-29T20:28:00.001-07:002012-04-29T20:28:34.411-07:00Follow Up on the New GameWell, the new game in town from the previous post has proved a crazy addition to our schedule. Between track, soccer and dance, today was my first day off since March. Really. <br />
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I wanted to follow up on my last post because track has been quite an adventure. See, with the Magster, track is really just a big play date that gets interrupted by the occasional race. During that race, the Magster must race against the friends she's playing with putting her in the position of trying to win a race against her friend. Quite frankly, this has not set well with her. She would rather play with her friends than race against them. <br />
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So, for 4 practice races, we watched as she loped around the track. Her first race she actually ran with her friend and the two of them had a conversation until we interrupted them by encouraging them to run. This does not imply she didn't do well. For her first season, she's actually done really well. She's placed a couple of times. She consistently lowered her times and lengthened her jumps. She also always had a fabulous time playing. But we always felt she wasn't trying.<br />
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Then last week happened. She was drafted to run the 400M for a relay team. It was a sprint medley and the 400M is the anchor leg. Even with all the conversation she actually had good times in the 400M, so it made sense that she ran the 400M. When she got the baton, she had about a 5 yard lead. And let me tell you, there was no doubt her heart was in that race. She opened up an 11 second lead because she was so worried she would lose it for her friends. We didn't know how fast she ran the leg, but we knew it was fast. <br />
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So, along comes this weekend. Qualifying weekend. If you don't come in 1st through 3rd place, you're done. She did awesome. She took 4 seconds off her personal best and finished in 4th place in the 400M. We were so happy for her because she did her best. Finally. Because of the previous week, she had two extra 400M's to run that day. I was a bit worried about her, but hey, she does well with competition. Time to test it. <br />
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In the second 400M, she did great. She got the baton in second place, fought off a serious challenge, ran down the leader and won the race for her team. I'm sure if we had a split it would have been another personal best. It's clear, the Magster likes to run for a team. However, she had one race left for the day and she had to anchor relay team with another 400M and she only had about 5 minutes to recover. <br />
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In the final race, even though she finished the race for her team and they qualified move on in the competition, she was in tears. It seemed like she came in last because the girls of all ages ran together, but her team was the only 3rd grade team. She only had to finish. The coaches told her, we told her, but she took it personally and gave it all to her team again. She ran so hard and showed such guts, we were all so very proud of her. <br />
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In the end, she has really loved track. She became a very competent 400M runner and most importantly, she really wants to run again next year. Onto Sectionals!One Lucky Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05746848519653479448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8558090.post-53421799243667346002012-02-07T21:13:00.001-08:002012-02-07T21:37:07.371-08:00New Game in TownFor those of you who have met the Magster, you know she has an endless amount of energy. Last Spring, with the Dad not doing so hot, I took her out of sports for 4 months and it was a huge mistake. You see, a tired Magster is a sweet Magster...a wired Magster is something else all together. She's never bad, just sort of out of control. <div><br /></div><div>This spring I knew we had to find something for her. So, I decided she'd run track. Why? Well, she's a pretty fast runner whenever she plays sports, she never gets tired and I was curious....Is she just quick or is she fast? There's a difference. No better way to find out then just have her run some races. </div><div><br /></div><div>Last week, I met the track coach during a parent meeting. He's an older guy, retired, been coaching kids for 18 years. Has taken kids to the national level, but by his own admission, it's been years since that's happened, but he'd like to see it again. He's seen all types of kids and can spot a kid avoiding running at practice. He has strict rules about warm up and cool down and is very focused on energy prevention. </div><div><br /></div><div>I almost cried tears of joy when he said, "I will make your kids tired. I will make your kids sore. They may cry, but if they hang with it, they will be well-conditioned athletes." I can count on 1 hand the number of times I've seen the Magster physically exhausted and I've never heard her complain of sore muscles...so this coach was a dream come true to me. I was giddy. </div><div><br /></div><div>She started practice last night. Practices are 1 hour long and they "run". They start with an 800, then they run 50's, then they take a water break, then they run more 50s, then they run a 400, then they go home. Sweaty, tired, sore. At least last night the Magster fit that description. I didn't think she'd make it to the car. She complained her legs hurt as soon as we got home. Once she sat down last night, she didn't get up for a long time. And she was quiet. Even La Nina asked what was wrong with her. This morning you would have thought she was an old lady the way she groaned as she got out of bed. (Insert an evil laugh here...courtesy of her mother.) </div><div><br /></div><div>She went back tonight. But tonight we only got about an hour of peace. She stayed up to her usual bedtime. She complained about some sore quads, but really that was it...darn it. She said it was much easier today and even kind of fun. I'm thinking by her next practice she'll be all adjusted, and that old coach better up the work outs...'cuz he just might have met his match. </div><div><br /></div><div>On a performance note, I'm quite proud of her. The team is for 2nd to 8th graders and she's hanging with the older kids on the longer runs. During the last 400, I saw her running with a couple of La Nina's friends as they finished. When I asked her if she was ran with them the whole time, she said, "No, Mom, I was passing them before we finished." I think she's going to really like track once they start racing. </div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div>One Lucky Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05746848519653479448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8558090.post-38875483492768818832012-02-02T21:27:00.000-08:002012-02-02T21:48:44.105-08:00The PlannerYou know, I'm a planner. I like to have a plan. I like to make lists. I like to be in the know. That's just how I roll. However, I've met my match in the Magster. You see, the Magster has put me on a "need to know" basis. She makes plans and tells me her "Plan" once it's all set. Frankly, she's out planning the planner.<div><br /></div><div>Take this weekend. Saturday is a bit chaotic. The Dad has big meetings all day Saturday and La Nina has dance all day long in Hayward. As the Magster sees it, her choice was between being bored with her father or bored with her sister and mother. She was also quite worried about missing an afternoon Futsal game, so her wheels started spinning. She's comes in from school yesterday. </div><div><br /></div><div>"Mom, you need to call 'C's mom about Saturday."</div><div><br /></div><div>"Huh?" I asked. </div><div><br /></div><div>"You could email or text her too. But C said I could go over there on Saturday morning, 'cuz they're not doing anything. Then Dad can pick me up and take me to Futsal when he's done." She then popped a cookie in her mouth and left the room, while I stared into space wondering exactly how I should approach other this mother. Had my little darling invited herself to someone else's house? </div><div><br /></div><div>Minutes later I got the following email from C's mom. "Hey, I heard Maggie's looking for someplace to hang on Saturday morning. We're around. Just let me know what time you're dropping her off. By the way, did she tell you about their science project?" </div><div><br /></div><div>No, I hadn't heard about the science project, but after several emails and I got the story from her friends Mom. Apparently, little Miss Always Something Cooking had planned her entire science fair entry, down to who's buying the board, what the experiment is and who's doing what work on the project. The Magster is 8. On the one hand, I love that she's so self sufficient. On the other hand, she's a little scary. I never know what she's got going. </div><div><br /></div><div>So, while her family is busy on Saturday, the Magster will be playing with her friend. According to her plan, her dad will show up at 1pm to pick her up, get her changed and get her to Futsal by 3pm. She'll then go with him to the evening meeting, where she will be in the company of lots of people she loves. That is unless, she's makes another plan for the evening. No one has called yet, so we may be in the clear. </div>One Lucky Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05746848519653479448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8558090.post-49242702625953260532012-01-05T23:48:00.000-08:002012-01-06T00:17:01.080-08:00Reading<div>La Nina's lack of interest in reading has always worried me. Mostly, because I'm such a reader. She's always been resistant to reading. We've tried everything from bribes to buying whatever books she wants to family reading time where we all read together. The money didn't interest her, the books I bought gathered dust and she kept trying to make small talk while everyone else read. I've tried fiction, non-fiction, graphics, fantasy, nothing really worked. Ok, the Fairy Dance series books worked...but I have a hard time counting those. She's obsessed with dance.</div><div><br /></div><div>This summer I started worrying that may be she was having some trouble with reading. The schools hadn't reported anything, her test scores were good, but I just couldn't figure it out her reluctance and it seemed a plausible explanation. I tried reading aloud with her and everything seemed fine. We'd read a chapter in a book, she'd remember the chapter and understand it the next day, but still if I wasn't reading the chapter with her she just wouldn't read the next chapter on her own, no matter what. </div><div><br /></div><div>When I brought up my concerns to the Dad, he informed me I was "a dork" as a kid and most kids didn't read as obsessively as I did. To which I informed him, most kids don't watch as much TV as he did as a kid So who was really the "dork"? I digress. </div><div><br /></div><div>When we went to her parent/teacher/student conference this fall, I brought up my concerns to her very surprised teacher. He informed me she was in the enrichment reading group (one of the highest) and was surprised to hear about her reluctance at home. After this conversation, I dropped the whole reading topic. Why was I obsessing if she wasn't struggling? Some people don't like to read as much as others, may be she was one of them. Even though by the time I was in 4th grade I had read the entire Laura Ingalls Wilder series and goodness knows how many Nancy Drew's on my own, people are different. </div><div><br /></div><div>Then, yesterday I caught her reading a book in her room. I was stunned. Pleasantly, stunned, but stunned none the less. She finished that 250 page book tonight and asked me to take her to the book store tomorrow to get the next in the series. Oh happy day!</div><div><br /></div><div>I asked her why she picked up a book yesterday, and here's what she told me. It explained the whole reluctance. Remember she's still on her Christmas break from school. At school, she always finishes her work early and when she does that, she's told to read. By the time she gets home from school, she's been reading on and off all day and she's sick of reading. She said she usually takes books from home to read (news to me) and that she's read most of the books in her room. Then she handed me a pile of used books. Probably about 15 that she's read since the start of school this year. Why is the mother is always the last to know?</div><div><br /></div><div>Needless to say, I will happily take her to the bookstore tomorrow. And God Bless the Diary of a Wimpy Kid series. It's not the first book she's read, but it's the one I figured out she actually does like to read. </div>One Lucky Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05746848519653479448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8558090.post-44902150726234251892012-01-03T19:46:00.001-08:002012-01-03T20:21:34.666-08:00Sew SimpleIf you asked my mom one of her great failings as my mother, she would tell you it was that I never learned to sew. She tried to teach me, but I didn't have the attention span or the interest to apply myself and learn. I remember attempting to make a skirt, sewing the panels on backwards, then chucking the whole thing into the laundry room just in time to head out to soccer practice. I knew I'd never wear that thing anyway.<div><br /></div><div>However, redemption comes in many forms and my mother's redemption came in the form of the Magster. She's the interested, eager and willing student I never was. Her and my Mom have already collaborated successfully on many pillow projects. And the Magster just loves to create all sorts of things with fabric at grandma's house. Animals, pillows, pouches, purses...you name it, Maggie will create it.. as long as she's at her grandmother's house...</div><div> </div><div>So, for Christmas, the Dad and I bought the girls a sewing machine of their own. To keep here. So, Maggie could sew all the time. WoW! What was I thinking. I don't know how to sew. It took me 2 mornings just to get the thing threaded, then the Magster broke a needle and it took me another couple of hours to get the needle changed. So, many hours into this gift and many "How To" videos on YouTube later we have a functional sewing machine. Yet, that doesn't mean I can sew.</div><div><br /></div><div>As part of the gift, I got a couple of patterns, thinking the Magster and I could tackle learning to sew together. These patterns were titled "Sew Simple". It reads "one easy project" right on the packaging. Those people are liars. Simple involves 18 steps. 11 cut outs. Appliques and something that involves paper backed webbing,. I don't even know what this is. Just reading the directions required several forays on google, trying to figure out what words mean. I couldn't figure out how to cut out the pieces of the fabric without calling my Mom. UGH! </div><div><br /></div><div>So, while my Mom relishes her moments of "I-told-you-you'd-need-sew", I'm putting together a basket for Maggie to take to her house tomorrow. If it's so darn easy to sew, maybe she can figure it these projects. And while you're at it, Mom, can you take Maggie to the fabric store for whatever that backing stuff is? I'm at a loss. </div>One Lucky Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05746848519653479448noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8558090.post-29234763500112519362011-12-19T21:37:00.000-08:002011-12-19T21:56:09.179-08:00A New Form of RetaliationOne night recently, when the girls were about to get into the shower, La Nina came running into the kitchen screaming with laughter that she'd been "snotted" by her sister. <div><br /></div><div>Snotted? I'd never heard of that before, so I asked for an explanation. La Nina looked at me as if I were dense and said, "Mom, she blew snot on me." </div><div><br /></div><div>This was disturbing on so many levels. Okay, first, it's just disgusting. Second, La Nina had been about to get into the shower, so wasn't exactly dressed when the alleged incident occurred and finally, and most disturbing, the act had occurred so many times she had a verb to describe it.</div><div><br /></div><div>As I was absorbing this information, the Magster came running into the kitchen, also screaming laughing that it wasn't her fault. La Nina had provoked her by farting on her. </div><div><br /></div><div>Now what's a mother to do? Child #1 farts on child #2 and child #2 snots in retaliation. Again, while I was lost in thought as to how to handle this situation, the Magster pointed out that she didn't hit her sister, therefore, had done nothing wrong. She never admitted to actually snotting her sister, but then again, the Magster will deny, deny, deny, no matter how damning the evidence. Let's just say, her sister had proof that indeed a snotting had occurred. </div><div><br /></div><div>Since there was bodily fluid involved I sent them both to the shower. La Nina really needed a shower and the Magster had most likely been farted on, so she wasn't in much better shape than her sister. Unable to address the issue with a straight face, I dropped the issue for the night. I mean really, how am I supposed to discuss this without crying from laughter? </div><div><br /></div><div>The next morning, I asked the Magster if she ever snotted her sister. To which, she nodded her head with a gleam in her eye. A satanic gleam. A gleam that said, "oh yeah, and what are you going to do about it, old lady?" To which, I answered, "Never do that to anyone but your sister and only when she farts on you." </div><div><br /></div><div>To La Nina I said, "Stop farting on your sister or you will get snotted." </div><div><br /></div><div>This is what parenting has come to in my house. Snotting is fair retaliation for farting. I never thought I'd stoop to this level with daughters. Yet here I am. </div>One Lucky Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05746848519653479448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8558090.post-86156673803409279722011-12-11T21:55:00.000-08:002011-12-11T22:05:46.111-08:00Swankville<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <o:documentproperties> <o:template>Normal</o:Template> <o:revision>0</o:Revision> <o:totaltime>0</o:TotalTime> <o:pages>1</o:Pages> <o:words>473</o:Words> <o:characters>2698</o:Characters> <o:lines>22</o:Lines> <o:paragraphs>5</o:Paragraphs> <o:characterswithspaces>3313</o:CharactersWithSpaces> <o:version>11.1539</o:Version> </o:DocumentProperties> <o:officedocumentsettings> <o:allowpng/> </o:OfficeDocumentSettings> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:worddocument> <w:zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:donotshowrevisions/> <w:donotprintrevisions/> <w:displayhorizontaldrawinggridevery>0</w:DisplayHorizontalDrawingGridEvery> <w:displayverticaldrawinggridevery>0</w:DisplayVerticalDrawingGridEvery> <w:usemarginsfordrawinggridorigin/> </w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--> <!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal">If you live any where in a 15-mile radius of where I live you have no doubt heard of the book, Tales from Swankville.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>It’s a fictionalized account of raising kids in the exact same city where I happen to live.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Thanks to some over zealous critics of this book, the publicity surrounding the book has driven it to must-read status for every mother in Swankville.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">The fact I just finished it makes me extremely behind the times.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>About a month ago, there wasn’t a mother in town who wasn’t reading the book, talking about the book, stressing that they were in the book.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>But for a lot of reasons, including Thanksgiving, the end of the soccer season and our annual Nutcracker chaos, I just finished it tonight…very unswanky of me, according to the book.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Of course, I simply must comment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><!--[if !supportEmptyParas]--> A disclaimer:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I know who the writer is.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I don’t know her by name, but when I saw her picture in the paper I realized her daughters used to dance at the same studio mine does before she moved on to another studio.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I remember her being a very committed dance mom, much more committed than I.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>She was always there, where for my sanity, I drop and run.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Perhaps I have some bias based on seeing her around. </p> <p class="MsoNormal"><!--[if !supportEmptyParas]--> My overall read on the book:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Are you kidding me?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>That’s it?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Am I missing something?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>The book is a series of blog posts about competitive parenting and other random thoughts on people who live in this town.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Is there competitive parenting in this city?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Yep.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Is it as bad as the writer describes?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Nope.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I have two kids in competitive activities. I’ve seen some sh*t, but I don’t believe it’s any worse here than anywhere else.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>“Here” being an upper class suburb that offers kids an amazing array of activities all of which can become extremely competitive at any given time and parents who are competitive enough to have found a way to earn enough money to buy a home in Swankville. People who live here are fundamentally competitive or they wouldn't live here. It's just a fact. </p> <p class="MsoNormal"><!--[if !supportEmptyParas]--> The thing is everything, every comment, every look seems to phase this woman. Comments other moms make don’t reduce me to tears. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I find most overt competitiveness amusing, some annoying, some really crazy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I find some it really sad for the kids.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Yet, I feel no desire to move out of state because of it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Do I come home and tell tales of dance mom’s misbehaving?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Yep.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Do I see parents who keep their kids in an activity that clearly makes the kid miserable?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Yep.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Do I see kids who compete in 2-3 activities at a time?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Yep. While I really hope, I’m not one of those misbehaving moms, and believe me, if either of my kids complains about an activity, I beg them to quit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>(They refuse, darn it.)<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I really can’t say much about overlapping activities as the Magster is pretty busy every October when soccer and basketball overlap.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> It would be insincere of me to claim to keep my kids to one activity at a time. </span>But I try to keep those over laps to a minimum and if my kids need a mental health day off, they take it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Is competitive parenting an important issue?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>It is, but this book is long on pointing it out and very short on offering solutions.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>At the end of the day, should you read this book?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>It’s not very well written.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>It doesn’t really hang together and the writer spends an awful lot of time patting herself on the back.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>If you’re dying to know what the scuttle is about, don’t spend the $9 on the paperback.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>It isn’t worth it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>It’s barely worth the kindle cost.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Call me, I’ll loan you my copy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <!--EndFragment-->One Lucky Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05746848519653479448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8558090.post-88290444548734240422011-09-17T16:43:00.000-07:002011-09-17T16:53:22.331-07:00Maybe I need to pay closer attention...I'm driving in my typical distracted mother mode. You know the mode: kid in the car, radio on, mind on the laundry, the messy kitchen, the grocery shopping list, etc. Suddenly a voice from the back seat. <div><br /></div><div>"Mom, don't you think this song is inappropriate for me to listen to?" </div><div><br /></div><div>Suddenly I tune into the radio as Katy Perry sings, "Last Friday night..." Have you heard the song? I can't remember the exact lyric, but skinning dipping after dark, warrants out for arrest, not remembering if they kissed are all part of the lyrics. Now, I'm considering the fact LaNina is now telling me about songs that she shouldn't to. </div><div><br /></div><div>Trying to cover myself, I answered, "Oh, can you hear that? I thought the volume was pretty low." I turn the volume down farther. But of course the truth is I wasn't paying any attention to the radio. </div><div><br /></div><div>"Mom, of course, I can hear it."</div><div><br /></div><div>"How do you know it's inappropriate?" I ask out of curiosity, because really how bad is it when my 9 year old is pointing out things like this to me?</div><div><br /></div><div>In her best pre-teen snear she answers, "I'm not stupid. The songs about a girl who drank too much alcohol, got kicked out of a bar and did some bad things." </div><div><br /></div><div>Okay then. I guess she's figured out a lot more than I give her credit for. And how many times has she heard that song anyways? </div>One Lucky Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05746848519653479448noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8558090.post-52497238630280418232011-09-11T20:21:00.000-07:002011-09-11T20:23:33.788-07:00Where were you when you heard?<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <o:documentproperties> <o:template>Normal</o:Template> <o:revision>0</o:Revision> <o:totaltime>0</o:TotalTime> <o:pages>1</o:Pages> <o:words>345</o:Words> <o:characters>1968</o:Characters> <o:lines>16</o:Lines> <o:paragraphs>3</o:Paragraphs> <o:characterswithspaces>2416</o:CharactersWithSpaces> <o:version>11.1539</o:Version> </o:DocumentProperties> <o:officedocumentsettings> <o:allowpng/> </o:OfficeDocumentSettings> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:worddocument> <w:zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:donotshowrevisions/> <w:donotprintrevisions/> <w:displayhorizontaldrawinggridevery>0</w:DisplayHorizontalDrawingGridEvery> <w:displayverticaldrawinggridevery>0</w:DisplayVerticalDrawingGridEvery> <w:usemarginsfordrawinggridorigin/> </w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--> <!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal">When you hear the question these days, you know exactly what they’re really asking.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Where were you 10 years ago when our world changed?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Where were you when the unexplainable happened?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Where were you when planes rammed into buildings and the towers fell?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">It’s hard for me to believe that it’s been 10 years since that horrific day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Like so many Americans, I’m still trying to understand it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I watched the terror unfold on television.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I didn’t move for a good three hours once I started watching.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Going to work felt moot, so I didn’t.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Neither did anybody else.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I just stood at the end of my bed and watched, chin open, eyes not believing what I was seeing.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">I remember thinking, “Why today?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>It’s just a Tuesday An ordinary Tuesday.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>It looks like a nice, sunny Tuesday in New York.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Why today?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> By the way, I didn't have to look up the day of the week. I remember that. </span>I remember thinking how quiet it was with no planes in the sky.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I remember wanting to wrap myself in an American flag and cry for my country.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><!--[if !supportEmptyParas]--> For my generation, 9/11 is the moment that Kennedy’s assassination was for my parents’ generation and Pearl Harbor was for my grandparents.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>As someone born a few years after Kennedy was shot, I never really understood why my folks talked about where they were when they heard about Kennedy until 9/11.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I never understood why they always mentioned it on my Aunt’s birthday until 9/11. For me, Kennedy’s death remains the part of a movie when everyone cried and I could only look around and wonder why.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>9/11 will be like that for my kids, I suppose.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>It’s a part of history they’ll never really understand on an emotional level.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">I’m a West Coast girl.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I’ve been to New York, but only on business.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I’ve seen the airports, a couple hotels, a couple of meeting rooms and that’s about it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Never been to the Statue of Liberty, Central Park or the Empire State Building.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I don’t know anyone who died on 9/11, but it doesn’t change the loss I felt that day and still feel watching the old clips.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>So sad so many innocent people died.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>So sad it was all so senseless.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>So sad the victims never knew the loss the nation felt at their passing. </p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I don’t know that I’ll do anything special today.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>My friend who is a pilot will be flying.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>So, I’ll say more than a few prayers for her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>If I see a firefighter, I’ll probably thank him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>It’s a symbolic gesture at best, but that doesn’t mean it’s not the most heartfelt thing I can do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <!--EndFragment-->One Lucky Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05746848519653479448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8558090.post-56130036105732473532011-09-05T20:08:00.000-07:002011-09-05T20:21:24.144-07:00Top 10 Things The Dad Can Do When He Starts Driving AgainMany of you know that for the past 11 months the Dad has not been able to drive. And let me tell you, I've been keeping a mental list of all the things he can do when he starts driving again. Here's my top ten:<div><br /></div><div>10. Make all late night store runs for milk.</div><div>9. Drive the dance carpool 4 times a week.</div><div>8. Park anywhere he likes without my commenting on what a horrible parking spot he selected.</div><div>7. Take the kids to school...every.single.morning.</div><div>6. Figure out where soccer practice is, then drive there. It's a moving target.</div><div>5. Fight to get the kids ready to go anywhere on time (except dance...La Nina is always ready for dance.) </div><div>4. Be the designated driver for any social event.</div><div>3. Take himself shopping for new clothes.</div><div>2. Leave the house with the kids so I can be home alone. Think about it. It's been a year.</div><div>1. Repay the year's worth of bad kids movies I've seen because "You have to drive anyways." </div><div><br /></div><div>Let's hope this chapter in our lives is getting close to behind us. I'm very ready to have another driver in the house.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div>One Lucky Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05746848519653479448noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8558090.post-53865432639564269092011-06-23T16:46:00.000-07:002011-06-23T16:58:39.381-07:00Unfavorite VisitorsEvery year, for the past 10 years, the Dad has hosted a charity golf event at a local country club. This event has raised 10s of thousands of dollars for the local hospital cancer research group. This year is no different. As he has done in the past, he's hosting a golf tournament in the same venue, at the same time of the year, for the same cause. Oh, but this year is different, because the country club is involved in a labor dispute and has locked out its union. That has left our family at the mercy of the unions.<div><br /></div><div>I was raised in a union household. I had health care, braces, an education all because of a union. So to be privately attacked by a union is shocking. Attacked a strong word? Here are the things that have happened in the last month.</div><div><br /></div><div>1.) Every hour for an entire day the union called our house to "encourage" the Dad to move his golf tournament. </div><div><br /></div><div>2.) The union printed and past out fliers with our home phone number on them encouraging their members to call us at home and pressure "the Dad" to move the golf tournament. </div><div><br /></div><div>3.) They've shown up on our door step to pleasantly ask the dad to move the tournament. </div><div><br /></div><div>However, we teach our kids not to bow to bullies and neither will he. It's awful that grown men and women are so willing to try to intimidate people raising money for charity with these tactics. They should be ashamed of themselves. No matter what their beef with their employer it has nothing to do with us, so why are we getting drug into it? </div><div><br /></div><div>The kids now know: the front door is to be locked at all times. We prefer they play in the back yard until the golf tournament is over. We don't answer the phone if we don't know who it is (unless Mommy is in the mood to do a acting.) :) Let's just say, the years of unsuccessfully trying to cancel my husband's Playboy subscription came in mighty handy to stop those phone calls. </div><div><br /></div><div>I wish my kids didn't have to learn these lessons, but at the same time, I'm very glad they learned we don't give into bullies. And if those Union thugs show up on our door steps again, I may just have to really go all out in my acting. I can act CRAZY really good. </div>One Lucky Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05746848519653479448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8558090.post-62773232270255218832011-05-29T08:49:00.000-07:002011-05-29T08:54:04.127-07:00Learning New Words<!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-size:16.0pt;font-family:Georgia"> There have been some new words floating around school, and the girls have been "experimenting" with them.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-size:16.0pt;font-family:Georgia"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: 21px; ">Last week the word was "constipation". The girls were using it in a song, rhyme thing they were singing and when I asked them what it meant, it was clear they had no clue. So, of course, this led us into a discussion regarding it's definition. Both girls got a funny look on their face when I explained it and sort of dropped the subject. Until it was time to use the word, now everyone seems to have it. Yep, "constipation". We're constipated morning, noon and night here. Under normal conditions, this amount of constipation could require medical intervention. Luckily, the "situations" seem to be resolving themselves very quickly once they've used the word. </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-size:16.0pt;font-family:Georgia"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: 21px; ">While we're still bantering about last week's word, a new word came home yesterday. La Nina had heard the word at school. "Hore", she was pretty sure it was short for horrible and therefore, really not a bad word at all. And I'll be darned if she didn't have a "hore" day because she was constipated. </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-size:16.0pt;font-family:Georgia">However, she and her friend tried to look it up in the dictionary, but you know, they just couldn't find it. She was a bit confused about why she couldn't find this new word under "h", so she thought she better ask the Dad about it. He wisely advised her it wasn't a nice word or a short version of "horrible" and she shouldn't be using it. But this didn't really answer her question as to why it wasn't in the dictionary. </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-size:16.0pt;font-family:Georgia">Next she hit me up and asked why it wasn't in the dictionary. Note: not what it meant, not if it was bad, just why she couldn't find it. So, I answered the question. I pointed out that in English there are some letters that are silent in front of "h" and that could change the spelling. Either way, "hore" was not a good word and she should never use it even if she found it in a dictionary somewhere. (Following all the parenting advice I've ever received, I only answered what I was asked and I wasn't asked for a definition...whew!)<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-size:16.0pt;font-family:Georgia"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: 21px; ">Now, of course, I'm walking on eggshells and I'm trying to figure out how to explain "prostitute" when she finds that word in a dictionary defining whore. </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-size:16.0pt;font-family:Georgia"> <o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"> <o:p></o:p></p> <!--EndFragment-->One Lucky Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05746848519653479448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8558090.post-87293202661394561902011-05-10T21:49:00.000-07:002011-05-10T22:10:33.059-07:00Running the Child: Session 1For those of you who have met the Magster, it will come as no surprise that she has an issue with excess energy. She's a bit like a puppy. She needs to be run. So, really, for her, sports like soccer and basketball are perfect They wear her out. But this isn't soccer or basketball season, and let me tell you, we made it one week without soccer. Between her little high pitched voice and over enthusiastic helping, it's time to make sure this child gets her "run". <div><br /></div><div>So, tonight, while La Nina was at dance, I decided I would take my puppy for a hike. I actually gave her a couple of choices: running on a track, riding bikes at a park near our house, hiking up the ridge. She chose to hike up the ridge. For those not from the area, the ridge is fairly steep incline and it goes for miles. Our goal was to make it to the first gate, about an hour round trip hike.</div><div><br /></div><div>When she jogged up the steep first part, we took the steeper of two paths up the hill. I walked at a fairly normal pace up the hill and she kept pace with no problem. About half way up the hill, I broke a sweat. She did not. About three-quarters of the way up the hill, I was huffing and puffing, she was not. When we had a choice about continuing to the top to get to the first gate or heading down the hill, she chose to keep going. She was terribly offended when anyone passed us on the trail and at one point, told me I needed to hurry to catch the people in front of us. </div><div><br /></div><div>She made it to the first gate in about 23 minutes and her only regret was that we had to head down to go pick up her sister. I promised her we would take some time and hike to the second gate on a weekend in the near future. </div><div><br /></div><div>The good news is she was nice and mellow when we came home and she wants to go up the ridge again. In fact, she's hoping we can do it soon. I hope I can keep up. </div>One Lucky Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05746848519653479448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8558090.post-5343139083833111232011-05-05T17:52:00.000-07:002011-05-05T18:21:19.418-07:00Life Lessons in DanceLa Nina wrapped up her 4th competitive da<img style="text-align: center;float: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 10px; margin-bottom: 10px; margin-left: 0px; cursor: pointer; width: 200px; height: 133px; " src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-p_9X1y2zTpw/TcNGxmRRtwI/AAAAAAAAAKw/M3YI93295MA/s200/S2F_1106.JPG" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5603400179279574786" />nce season this past weekend. It's been a good year for her. Her groups have generally done very well and while the dances get harder every year, she always rises to the challenge and performs beautifully. <div><br /></div><div>This year was her first year competing in a style of dance called, Lyrical. It's a cross between ballet and jazz. I think it looks like contemporary, though I'm sure many dance experts would scoff at my untrained eye. For young dancers, when you're cast in a lyrical piece, it's a sure sign you're growing up and being viewed as "a big girl" by your studio. I don't think studios see it that way, but I know at least one young dancer who does. Her group danced to the Rob Thomas song, Little Wonders, a personal favorite song of mine and a lovely piece of music with a great message. </div><div><br /></div><div>Lyrical is a tough style of dance. The judges are demanding. Toes need to be pointed. Shoulders need to be relaxed. Movement needs to be fluid. Tough, tough, tough when you're going slow and every goof up can be spotted easily. Her trio of two 8 year olds and one 9 year old saw very little success in terms of scoring. This dance was consistently her lowest scoring piece and deservedly so on more than one occasion, which brings us to last weekend. </div><div><br /></div><div>When the Little Wonders took the stage, they performed well for the first 1/2 of the dance, then tragedy struck...they lost music. And what do you suppose those dancers did? Well, like the professionals they are, they kept dancing, keeping time in their heads and keeping an eye on each other to ensure they stayed together. It was just an amazing thing to see these little girls carry on to the cheers of their mothers and really nothing else. I was so proud of them. </div><div><br /></div><div>Backstage, I asked La Nina how she knew to do that. Had her teachers told her if they lost music to keep going? No, she said. She saw her friends kept going and she didn't want to let them down, so she just watched them and imagined the music in her head. What a great answer. </div><div><br /></div><div>My biggest concern about her choosing dance over sports has been that she's missing the team experience, but last weekend changed my mind completely. <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">I finally saw team work truly happen in the realm of dance. Her answer proved to me she had learned her lessons</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium; "> about team work well. </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium; "> </span></div><div>Now, wouldn't you think that this mishap and professionalism would help them out in scoring? Well, you'd be wrong. Dancers are expected to continue and not react to unfortunate happenings on stage. They did only what was expected and were scored appropriately. But somehow I think the life lesson they learned facing that challenge is worth a lot more than any scoring award. Personally, Friday's High Silver will be the performance I remember most vividly from this season. </div><div><br /></div><div><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">The picture above was taken during the performance of Little Wonders. It was snapped before the a cappella portion of the dance started. </span></i></div><div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div></div>One Lucky Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05746848519653479448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8558090.post-9053403430362973752011-04-24T22:21:00.000-07:002011-04-24T22:32:50.060-07:00Slumber PartiesOn Friday night, we wrapped up La Nina's 1 1/2 birthday celebration with a slumber party. For those unfamiliar with the event, it's when 8-10 girls sleep over at one girl's house. There's lots of squealing, screaming, running and talking. There's food and drinks and movies. And lots more talking. Most of you know what I'm talking about. But some do not. The reason I know this is the Dad really had no idea what a slumber party was until it started at our house.<div><br /></div><div>Sure, he went to sleep overs as a child, but he'd never quite seen or heard anything like this. At first, he braved the party. He helped serve dinner. He poured beverages. He may have even cleared a couple of plates. Then, I lost him. He just disappeared. And I swear, I couldn't find him. I looked in the office, I looked in the bedroom, I checked the garage...nothing. </div><div><br /></div><div>I was too busy keeping track of kids to worry about him, so I sort of forgot about him. About 10:30, I headed to the back of the house to begin the falling asleep ritual so crucial to the success of any slumber party. It's the part when I, the mother, tell the kids to be quiet and go to sleep. The kids ignore me, as expected. And the games really begin. I found the Dad huddled in the bedroom and his eyes widened when I walked into the room. I've never seen him so frightened in all my life.</div><div><br /></div><div>"What happens now?" he asked. </div><div><br /></div><div>"They don't go to sleep," I answered. "It the best part of the party. I tell them to be quiet, they ignore me. Then I tell them again, they ignore me. This could go on for hours." </div><div><br /></div><div>He looked bewildered. He looked confused. He looked hopelessly male. "Why?" he asked.</div><div><br /></div><div>"Because this is what happens at slumber parties," I answered. I swear, did this man not have a childhood.</div><div><br /></div><div>The ritual began: I sternly warned, the kids ignored, I sternly warned, they ignored. Finally, they quieted down and I fell asleep. In the end, the party went great. All the kids agreed it was fun. And we actually got more than 6 hours sleep. La Nina's birthday is finally over, and I finally know the one thing that truly scares my husband: the dreaded slumber party. </div>One Lucky Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05746848519653479448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8558090.post-30906030458032969352011-03-27T21:42:00.000-07:002011-03-27T22:06:38.853-07:00Science FairFor the first time, we have not one, but two entries in the school's science fair. For La Nina, this was required. All third graders at our school must complete a science fair project. For the Magster, it was optional, but since she must keep up with her sister, I suppose it was a requirement for her too. Both girls worked on the project with partners. Both girls did a great job on their projects. And both teams of girls required a lot of help to make this happen. <div><br /></div><div>First, they had to pick a topic. La Nina greeted every conversation about a topic with a shoulder shrug. We looked online for ideas, we visited a science family night at the school, nothing appealed to her. Then one day, I asked a woman at work for ideas and she had a winner: How does the sugar content of gum affect bubble size? La Nina signed on immediately for the project involving gum chewing. For the Magster, the topic was easy. She and her partner decided seals were cute, harp seals were the cutest and therefore, their project would be about the life cycle of harp seals. </div><div><br /></div><div>The Magster and her partner set a schedule for their work sessions. They researched one session, they wrote and translated in the next session and in the final session they assembled their board. La Nina and her partner had a plan too: chew gum and blow bubbles. That was it. Thankfully, the other mother focused them and helped them figured out a measurement method. They had a writing session and an assembly session too. And once they got started they were fine. Both teams spent about 8 hours of work on their projects. (This does include breaks for play, though the seal girls required less focusing than the gum girls, but the seal girls had less sugar than the gum girls.) </div><div><br /></div><div>Here's my thing: There is no way kids can do these sort of projects without serious parental intervention. Trust me, the Magster and her partner far exceeded my expectations of what a couple of second graders to pull off on their own. They did almost all of their own research. The only thing I helped with was avoiding images of the harp seal slaughter- though they did learn all about it. They did all their own writing and most of their translations even the native spanish speaking dad didn't know how to say a few scientific words in Spanish. But how can third graders, ask a question, identify a method, create a hypothesis, record results and draw conclusions without an adult saying "you know, I'm not sure you can conclude more sugar is always better from those results." Yet, the third graders translated every word of their work into Spanish, so they should be proud too. But in the end, who's project was it? </div><div><br /></div><div>Well, let's just say this: In two minutes of chewing, sugarless gum yields larger bubbles than regular gum and the population of harp seals has rebounded dramatically in the last decade due to governmental restriction on hunting. I swear, those weren't my science projects. But me and the other moms were sure happy when they wrapped up their work. </div>One Lucky Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05746848519653479448noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8558090.post-66257496208242070362011-03-15T20:55:00.000-07:002011-03-15T21:07:05.526-07:00The School Lunch MenuAs a working mom, the best deal in town is the school lunch. For $3 a day, I can feed the kids a hot lunch that I don't have to pack. The kids generally like it, but lately, La Nina has been bustling about the kitchen in the morning making her own lunch. (See what happens when kids figure out their mother isn't going to do something for them? INDEPENDENCE! A good thing.)<div><br /></div><div>Anyhoo, I asked why the sudden interest in "taking" and here's the answer.</div><div><br /></div><div>"Because on Wednesday's the pizza is only yarn and cardboard," she answered.</div><div><br /></div><div>I tried to reason: They aren't serving kids yarn and cardboard, but she insisted...yarn and cardboard was on the menu.</div><div><br /></div><div>The reality of this answer is amusing. Wednesday's is Revolution Food day, the day each week, that the school brings in organic, whole grain, healthy fare to nourish the bodies of their young charges. Apparently, all that health food isn't cutting the mustard on taste. According to my young eater, the pizza crust is dry, the cheese doesn't taste quite right and the sauce is bland. So Oprah, you may have featured this menu on your show, but I think you needed to convince some average kids to eat it. My average kid is opting out, taking a peanut butter sandwich, apples and crackers. At least it isn't yarn and card board. </div>One Lucky Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05746848519653479448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8558090.post-73627682348333040482011-03-07T21:23:00.000-08:002011-03-07T21:53:25.473-08:00A Story of ContrastsLa Nina and I spent the weekend at a dance convention. That means dancing 16 hours in two days for La Nina and a lot of sitting around and holding shoes for me. This weekend the dancers were sharing the space with another group of kids: the kids competing in the National Chess Finals. And let's just say, dancers and chess players mix like, well, let's just say they don't really mix. Here's why: <div><br /></div><div>Dancers dress in the skimpiest clothes their mothers will allow. Dancers regularly walk around barefoot in a metallic green bikini with spiked hair, full of glitter. Chess players wear solid colored-long sleeve, collared shirts, sensible shoes and thick glasses. While the little boy chess players are rather fascinated by the boisterous dancers, the mothers of chess players are not so impressed and regularly steer their little prodigies as far from the dancers as possible. </div><div><br /></div><div>Dancers travel in packs of 3-6, if they're over 7 they refuse to be seen much with their mothers and typically can be heard long before they are seen, which is something when you consider on how they're dressed. Chess players travel alone, usually with their mothers and are so quiet that they typically go unnoticed until a dancer leaps or spins into one on the way to the lunch line. Even though the leaping and turning dancer has flattened the poor chess player who was only waiting patiently for his lunch, somehow the dancer is offended and is the only person complaining when in fact the poor, little chess player is the one who was knocked down. </div><div><br /></div><div>Chess players sit quietly with their mothers during lunch. They put their napkins in their laps, they use silver ware and they never use their chair as a prop to show their friend how to "pliè". The chess players eat about a 1/3 of their lunch and spend the rest of their break resting. Dancers eat like starving wolves. They consume a sandwich, their mother's salad, a cookie, chips and possibly a water or soda in about 5 minutes. Then they jump up and begin spinning, leaping and begging their mothers to go back into the practice room, because they really, really want to work on their turns. </div><div><br /></div><div>The mothers of chess players look on in horror at the scene being caused by the dancers in the lunch room, because really, it's quite chaotic. Kids are leaping, turning, running in and out in packs and occasionally doing all of the above in perfect unison. The mothers of dancers look longing at the little chess players and wish they could spend some time in a quiet room filled with little boys moving pawns, rooks, queens and kings around a checkered board. Then the mothers of dancers realize the mothers of the chess players look just as tired as they do, and they pick up their lunch dishes and go back to the practice room.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div>One Lucky Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05746848519653479448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8558090.post-32466626110847011192011-02-27T18:07:00.001-08:002011-02-27T18:41:57.484-08:0030 things I can't do while I'm in the showerFor years now, my showers have been a public event. If I want privacy while showering, I have to go to the gym. In my house, when I step in the warm spray, it's like the kids hear the theme song for "Phineas and Ferb". They come running to see the spectacle. I've tried locking the door. They actually walked into the yard and entered through the slider. They've also staged sit ins outside the locked door. So, I'm hoping to clarify exactly what I can not do while I'm in the shower in order to gain a shred of privacy and may be a little peace and quiet too. <div><br /></div><div>I cannot:</div><div><br /></div><div>1.) Brush your hair</div><div>2.) Open the tooth paste</div><div>3.) Make your breakfast</div><div>4.) Find your missing soccer sock. (By the way, the game isn't for several hours.)</div><div>5.) Tell you where Thomas Jefferson graduated from college or how many children he had</div><div>6.) Time your reading</div><div>7.) Help you conjugate verbs</div><div>8.) Get the new tights out of your dresser</div><div>9.) Spell check your email to your friend</div><div>10.) Find your missing tap shoe</div><div>11.) Change the channel on the television</div><div>12.) Remove the parental controls on the television, even if it is a show you're allowed to watch</div><div>13.) Reach a water for you to take to school</div><div>14.) Read the school lunch menu, which is hung conveniently where you can read it yourself</div><div>15.) Find your library book, when I didn't even know you had a library book</div><div>16.) Help you trim your toe nails</div><div>17.) Find hair ties</div><div>18.) Find your back pack</div><div>19.) Find your bootie shorts</div><div>20.) Make brownies for pulga</div><div>21.) Explain why it doesn't snow here</div><div>22.) Explain why Santa doesn't visit Jewish kids</div><div>23.) Explain why the tooth fairy sometimes forgets you lost a tooth</div><div>24.) Explain why "Susie" tooth fairy brings $5 per tooth and yours only brings $1</div><div>25.) Tell you what People magazine means when it says "It's Over" next to Taylor Swift and some guy</div><div>26.) Tell you why the lady in people magazine wears a dress that almost shows her privates</div><div>27.) Explain you why you shouldn't be reading People magazine. </div><div>28.) Change the cookies I put in your lunch for goldfish</div><div>29.) Cut the crusts off your peanut butter sandwich</div><div>30.) Stitch the piece of elastic onto your hat for dance, when I never even knew you had a piece of elastic that needed to be stitched on by today</div><div><br /></div><div>Finally, I'll never understand why you are bugging me while I'm in the shower when your father is sitting at the kitchen table reading the paper and sipping coffee in complete quiet. He is completely capable of covering all of the items above. </div>One Lucky Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05746848519653479448noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8558090.post-35300361584627976302011-02-22T21:26:00.000-08:002011-02-22T21:53:40.987-08:00A Rare HappeningThis has been a strange couple of days. Both kids are sick at once. Both are running fevers. Both are complaining of headaches. Both are complaining of sore throats. It's not odd to have sick kids this year, but to have two kids sick at exactly the same time, odd. <div><br /></div><div>Then today, it's all explained: 11 out of 25 kids in their class stayed home sick. Obviously, the whole room full of kids caught some nasty bug at once, not just mine. But this has led us to discovered an unexpected aspect of having kids in the same class: they get sick on the same schedule. Whodathunk?</div><div><br /></div><div>It's not completely inconvenient. 1.) I made one appointment with the doctor for the both of them. She was happy to combine appointments. It saves us both time. 2.) It condenses the overall time of people being sick in the house thus reducing the amount of time the Dad and I have to juggle the coverage of sick kids. 3.) Cuts down on trips to the pharmacy. However, this does not mean it cuts down on the number of meds purchase, just the number of trips to buy meds. If only they could agree on one type of fever reducer. (La Nina likes grape, the Magster is a fan of bubble gum flavors.)</div><div><br /></div><div>Dual illnesses also sort of complicates the whole getting up in the middle of the night. Let's say you are up with one and check the other one and discover the sleeper is burning up with a fever. Do you wake up the sleeper to take their temperature? I did, and then had an energetic Magster awake for an hour and a half from 3am to 4:30am. Bad move. I should have known better with that child. Never wake a sleeping Magster. I learned that lesson in China, what was I thinking?</div><div><br /></div><div>Then, there's also the whole thermometer dilemma. I swipe it on one kid, I swipe it on the next kid. It's 3 in the morning. By the time I'm done with the second kid, I can't remember what it said for the first kid and she's already back to sleep. Do I go back and swipe again and risk a bitter angry La Nina or just console myself that it was over 101? I chose just go with assumption she had a pretty high fever and skip retaking her temperature. I already had the spunky Magster wide awake, no need to add to the middle of the night party. </div><div><br /></div><div>If this whole thing follows the same path as the kids that were sick last week, someone will have strep (my money's on La Nina) hopefully not both of them. Both will run fevers for 4 days. We're on day 2-3. So, the kids will be back in school by Thursday or Friday. And hopefully, I'll figure out how to manage the midnight nursing duties a little more efficiently. </div>One Lucky Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05746848519653479448noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8558090.post-5504178263242395542011-02-11T22:53:00.000-08:002011-02-11T23:03:02.201-08:00The Rest of the Story<!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal"><i>I’m sure there are many people reading this and worried about what I’m going to write. My blog post on the grant at my school raised a few eyebrows and tonight I’m going to write, as Paul Harvey would say, the rest of the story.</i></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Last Friday, the principal and district officials were generous enough with their time to meet with me regarding my concerns on the grant.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Given we were never going to agree on the intent of the grant, I asked them questions about the process used to select how the grant would be used and how exactly the implementation would be executed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span> </p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Everyone I met with concurred that no alternatives to a “pilot” smart classroom were considered.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>At one point, someone said that no alternatives were offered, but none were solicited.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>The grant’s dispensation strategy was never reviewed with staff or parents in a discussion format before it was decided and therefore, no one knew alternatives could be offered.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>No one can say why this is the best alternative for our school.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>No one can say why dividing the grant 60% into one class and 40% to the rest of the school is the optimal spend split.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>Essentially, this decision has no strategy behind it.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">The Smart Classroom has been dubbed a “pilot”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>This means it’s the administration’s intent to roll this out to every classroom at our school.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>According to district officials, “pilots” need a champion and it would be too difficult to train multiple staff members on the use of this equipment in a shared environment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Therefore, it needs to be in a single classroom with a single champion.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I’ve run a couple of pilots in my day, and the power user scenario is often helpful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>But I’ve also run pilots with multiple users and found this information very valuable.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>If the technology is too difficult to use for the average user, adoption rates are very low.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Best to discover an adoption problem during a pilot phase rather than during implementation phase in my experience.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Besides if the plan is to roll this out to all classrooms, shouldn’t as many teachers as possible use it to help support the roll out efforts?</p> <p class="MsoNormal">“Pilots” in the business world are often used to prove an assumption.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>We can save so many dollars by making a change or we can make more money by doing it that way.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>You need to have before data and after data to prove these assumptions, and you need to be able to demonstrate something worked before budget is allotted for full implementation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>At least this is my experience with pilots.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>When I asked about the “pilot” process in education, the answers were vague.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>The key educational benefit:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>interactivity, capturing kids at teachable moments.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Applications?<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>The technology could be used to assist in science lessons.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Examples of lessons: no examples could be offered.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>There was a timeline, but no real methodology behind measuring success and no one supervising results outside of the grant recipient.</p> <p class="MsoNormal"> The next round of funding was another question mark for me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Corporations were one answer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>We live in a wealthy suburb with schools that rank in the top 10% of the state (www.schooldigger.com).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>To implement smart classrooms in one school of 28 classrooms it would take about $420K.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>If a corporation had that much money to spend, do people honestly think they’d spend it in a district like ours?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>In my experience,<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>corporations want to see big results for the dollars they spend.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>District like ours do not allow for big results.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>We’re already successful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>The other answer I heard was the PTA.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Our PTA is a dedicated group of individuals who do amazing things for our school, but even a city-wide fundraising campaign only raised $355K for ALL elementary schools last year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>To assume a parent group can raise $400K is unfair to those dedicated parents that pour their heart and souls into our school community day in and day out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Finally, no money was set aside to maintain this system or buy replacement parts.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>The school will be handing hand held devices to 6 year olds and expecting them not to break those devices.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I have two very mellow daughters, and things get broken.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>I can’t imagine any hand-held devices will last long in a classroom setting with young kids.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>So, things are going to be broken and there will be no budget to replace them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>That means the teacher will be hitting up parents or the PTA for money to maintain this pilot or it will become an expensive piece of classroom furniture within the next 18 months.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">I’m a big fan of technology in the classroom.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>And I might be a big fan of Smart Technology at our school had this project been thought through.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>However, I can not support a project that is exclusionary with very little strategy behind it. In this case, the use of this grant is a big mistake.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>And sadly, no one in my meetings last week was willing to admit it or do anything to help correct it.<span style="mso-spacerun:yes"> </span>And that’s the rest of the story.</p> <!--EndFragment-->One Lucky Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05746848519653479448noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8558090.post-21602706646014507672011-02-02T20:34:00.000-08:002011-02-02T20:49:22.110-08:00Give that woman a raise<i>We now return to our regular, dull editorial content. My detour into political blogging has now ended but I reserve the right to return to it at any time. </i><div><i><br /></i></div><div>With the Dad's current condition hiring a nanny became critical to our ability to function as a family. I found a woman who fits well with our family and has become my right arm in making things happen and getting kids where they need to be. She's been with us for a couple of months now. Apparently, the honeymoon is over, because the other night the girls started complaining about her. Being a fair and open-minded parents, the Dad and I asked them for their complaints. Here's the list or a very fair representation of them:</div><div><br /></div><div>1.) From both of them: She makes us do our homework right after we finish our snacks and she checks it. If it isn't right, she makes us do it again. </div><div><br /></div><div>2.) From the Magster: She only lets me have 2 cookies after school. After that I have to eat fruit or cheese or something healthy.</div><div><br /></div><div>3.) From La Nina: She gets mad at me if I take too long after school. She says it's rude to make her and Maggie wait for me. </div><div><br /></div><div>4.) From both of them: She won't let us play with our DS's until we're done with our homework and have put away all our stuff. </div><div><br /></div><div>This is where they stopped, because the Dad and I were laughing so hard we were crying. She makes them do their homework, she makes them eat healthy snacks and she forces La Nina to be considerate of others. Oh yeah, she's really awful. NOT! Sounds like we hired ourselves a good nanny and the kids are just going to have to cope.</div>One Lucky Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05746848519653479448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8558090.post-77175754109913357622011-01-29T21:24:00.000-08:002011-02-02T07:37:20.465-08:00The "Right" ThingLast fall, I heard about a great opportunity for my school. A local company was offering grants to teachers for their classrooms. The grants were for Science, Math, Education and Technology for up to $2000 per classroom. So, I helped my teacher complete her grant, then I went to the staff meeting at my school and explained the process to the other teachers. I made myself available to answer questions, I provided my grant request and I even submitted a grant or two on behalf of teachers. <div><br /></div><div>The reason I did this is that the schools need the money but also there was an opportunity for a larger grant. If teacher's filled out their grant request correctly, then their grant could earn their school a $25,000 grant. In hard times, $25,000 goes a long ways at a school and what school doesn't need the money? I wanted my school to win that grant. </div><div><br /></div><div>About 5 teachers received grants at my school and 1 of those grants became a semi-finalist for the school wide grant for $25,000. I was so excited. May be this could happen for our school, I thought. These bigger grants were to be awarded in only two counties, and the schools in our city are among the wealthiest in the area. But, our school has more than 25% of its students on the federal lunch program and receives Title 1 funding, so we were classified as having moderate poverty. In the grant world, this was huge. I crossed my fingers and sent all my good vibes to the grant selection committee. $25,000 would do so much for my school.</div><div><br /></div><div>When the announcements came out great news: one of the grants from our school was selected as a winner and our school won $25,000. </div><div><br /></div><div>Then, odd things started happening. I heard a rumor at school that the teacher who wrote the grant told everyone she wrote a grant for $25,000. The money was hers. This wasn't true. The grant she wrote was for $800. It was honored as a great idea and the school was awarded $25,000 because of her idea. She was NOT given $25,000. Then, I saw a congratulations sign the parents of her class had made. And noticeably absent was any real excitement around the school. What was going on? Then a friend, with a child in the class came by and when I asked him about the grant, he told me all about how the teacher was spending all the money in their class. When I told him the story of the grant, he was shocked and told me he'd keep his ears open. </div><div><br /></div><div>I decided at that time to send a note of congratulations to the principal as well as a copy of the rules. Surely, he would see the light. Surely, he would reign in this teacher. Surely, "logic" would prevail. Time went on. And still no real news on the grant. Then, this week, there was news, big news. </div><div><br /></div><div>The teacher had spent $15,000 in her classroom to create a "Smart Classroom", only $10,000 would go to the school. WHAT THE F***? I think literally those were my words (without the stars). This meant only 25 kids would benefit from something that could have touched 700. If you want a smart class, why not put it in the science room where every kid could take advantage of it? Why would you send $600 per child on 25 kids and less than $15 a child on everyone else? Do first graders really need a smart classroom when they are only learning to read? Was I missing something? </div><div><br /></div><div>Terrified I was too late, I sent an email to the principal Tuesday night and asked for confirmation of the rumor. I also sent a note to the person who runs the grant program to find out exactly the rules. </div><div><br /></div><div>It took two days for the principal to respond. But I heard from the company first. The company had decided school's could decide to spend the money in whatever way it chose. They were steadfast that they wouldn't get involved. If the school wanted to put the money in one classroom, it was at the principal's discretion. They would not get involved. (Rats!) And at the end of the second day, I heard from the principal that he fully supported the teacher's plan. I was sick. Truly sick. </div><div><br /></div><div>I was depressed all Thursday night. How could one person manipulate a system so thoroughly to the detriment of so many kids? I thought teachers were supposed to care about kids. If she felt the need to be rewarded for her idea, I wouldn't have complained about $2,500 (10% of the total), but 60%? I was back to cussing when I thought about it. What a waste. I mean, really a senseless waste. </div><div><br /></div><div>I went to breakfast with my friends yesterday morning and told them the story. They were shocked. Here we were, 4 parents who are involved in our school and I was the only one who knew anything about the grant and its misappropriation. One of these friends encouraged me to call the School District Office, but I was so sick I wasn't sure I could do it. </div><div><br /></div><div>I came home and the Dad started in on me. "You've got to call. Just see if it helps," he said. So, I placed the call. I spoke to someone who is very high up at the district. He graduated from high school a few years a head of me, so we're acquaintances...at best. Anyway, he knew nothing of the grant. (This is $25,000, isn't odd no one knows about this?) and he was quite surprised when I told him about the distribution scheme. He said he would look into it and get back to me.</div><div><br /></div><div>I hung up and have heard nothing else. I may not. I was probably too late in my final hail mary phone call and I probably should have inserted myself into the process when the silence was so deafening. But I just kept thinking, the school would do the "right" thing. Unfortunately, sometimes when money is involved, people forget the "right" thing and greed takes over. I know this. I've learned this many times, and I don't know why I'm still caught off guard. </div><div><br /></div><div>I've hung up my crusader guns for now. My kids still have 3 years at this school. A teacher who would manipulate a grant to her own benefit, is certainly capable of manipulating something else and making things miserable for my kids. So, I'm not making any more calls, and this blog post is the last I'll even mention of this incident publicly. But let me tell you, I'll never give another dime to the school's general fund. From now on, my contributions go to my kids' classrooms. I'll never again trust the school administration. And forget my vote for the property tax. There is no way. If a school can't be trusted with $25,000, how can I trust a school district with millions? </div><div><br /></div><div><i>Note to readers: This entry has received a great deal of attention around school. I wrote it when I was extremely frustrated and have modified slightly to remove a portion that I felt uncomfortable having in the public forum. I never intended for this entry to be a character attack. However, an issue of character is at the heart of this matter and it needed to be addressed. </i></div>One Lucky Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05746848519653479448noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8558090.post-73237226494547489332011-01-14T20:35:00.001-08:002011-01-14T21:41:39.597-08:00Tiger Mama??If you're a mom, you've probably read the Wall Street Journal article about <a href="http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052748704111504576059713528698754.html">Why Chinese Moms are Superior. </a> I read this with great interest earlier in the week and have spent a lot of time talking about Amy Chua's parenting advice with other moms. First we all agree, Amy Chua is a brilliant marketer. She's started quite a debate, just before her parenting book comes out and we're all curious about what she has to say about parenting. <div><br /></div><div>To that end, responses to her methods have varied. Some moms find her parenting theory really offensive. Kids need more of a soft touch than a kick in the butt, according to these moms. And really, kids are fragile. I've never viewed my kids as fragile. When I met my kids as babies, they were both quite spirited. And let's face it: both my kids survived for a year in a Chinese orphanage. Nothing fragile about a kid who can do that. </div><div><br /></div><div>I found this essay interesting. My kids don't call the shots. The Dad and I are parents. They have firm bedtimes and rules around homework and screen time, television, computer and handheld devices. They are expected to be polite, say please and thank you and generally, act respectfully towards others. They do their homework nightly or we don't sign their organizers and they suffer the consequences. La Nina likes to test this one. We make them behave, but they are far from perfect. We're in charge, but we're giving them a lot of lee way. </div><div> </div><div>We're letting our kids make decisions about their activities within reason. We're letting them decide how hard to study on optional school work. We've given them a voice in their causes from a very young age. And while I'm not sure that makes us liberal, I've always done this in order for them to feel okay about expressing their opinions and articulating their feelings in a respectful way. But may be this isn't always the best thing. So, I've been experimenting with a couple of concepts this week. </div><div><br /></div><div>1.) Forcing a kid to do something they don't want to do for a purpose instills self-confidence. The poor Magster was my victim on this one. She has struggled to learn her times 3 multiplication table for months. She's a year ahead of herself in math, so I haven't worried about her lack of interest in learning her multiplication tables. But this week, I decided she was going to master the times 3. And let me tell you, she mastered her times 3 in one evening with a little Chinese mothering and 30 chocolate chips. Today she brought home her test with a 100%. She wasn't traumatized by me not letting her quit, and she was very happy she passed her test. I've already warned her, she'll learn her times 4 this week. </div><div><br /></div><div>2.) Fun comes with hard work and achievement. La Nina got involved in this experiment. La Nina has been talking about taking next year off dance. I've been listening to her patiently and I've reached the conclusion she doesn't really want to quit. She just likes to talk about it. So, when she mentioned this the other night, I decided it was time to end her churn on this pointless conversation. As she stewed, I simply said. "You'll dance next year." She was appalled by my attitude. She demanded an explanation and all I said was, "You're going to dance because you'll have more fun doing that than anything else." She argued. She sulked. She told me I was mean. And after a few minutes of this, she agreed with me. There was no deep discussion. She accepted I was right. Again, Chinese Mothering, no worries about self esteem or letting her process. I just made the decision for her and ended the discussion. (Yes, I may regret this, but I know it's right for her.)</div><div><br /></div><div>This article made me realize that it's okay to give my kids a good firm push every now and again. It's also okay not to listen to their noise. It's their job to make some noise, and it's my job to shut it down. However, I doubt I'll be threatening my kids with their Christmas if they aren't first in their class. I still think I'd rather have a happy kid, than a stressed out one. However, I have to admit, I'm curious about Amy Chua's book. Not sure I'm impose all of her methods, but a few may be worth trying.</div>One Lucky Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05746848519653479448noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8558090.post-3999895752548990052011-01-06T21:45:00.000-08:002011-01-06T22:31:08.030-08:00Really? Is this necessary?There's been a buzz around the dance studio. A big name ballet teacher is evaluating kids and offering private lessons. I read the email announcing this news just before the holidays and promptly deleted it. For crying out loud, she's in 3rd grade...why on earth do we need an hour long evaluation followed by private or semi-private lessons? <div><br /></div><div>Then, over the holidays I ran into someone I consider a sane dance mom and she asked if we were participating. "No," I laughed. "That seems more important for the older girls." Her daughter is much older than La Nina, so I assumed that was her interest. </div><div><br /></div><div>Until she enlightened me. It appears I was the minority parent who casually deleted this email. "Hmmm," I thought. Then I dismissed all other thoughts about this topic. Really, she's in 3rd grade. This week I received another email urging me to have La Nina evaluated. I gracefully declined this invitation (at least I answered it) and left the house to pick up La Nina from dance. </div><div><br /></div><div>"When's my evaluation?" she asked as she climbed into the van with her dance bag over her shoulder. </div><div><br /></div><div>"Uh...." I answered, because I'm articulate like that when my kid catches me off guard.</div><div><br /></div><div>"Friend A went last week, and Friend B went too. Friend C is going tomorrow and Friend D is going Friday, when do I go?"</div><div><br /></div><div>After lots of begging, pleading, conversing with other dance moms I respect and backtracking with the studio, La Nina has an appointment. But I really still can't get over the central question, is this necessary at her age? </div><div><br /></div><div>So, I asked some parents outside the dance world how these things work in their kids sports. I was shocked by their answers. Apparently, this is common practice in their respective sports and the prices offered to me were competitive if not low compared to what they were already paying. If you have a kid who is serious at a sport, private coaches for batting are very common as young as 4th grade for baseball and 2nd grade for swimming. (Admittedly, it's a small sample. ) </div><div><br /></div><div>I asked my friend why. "Well," my one friend said, "I just want him to the have experience of playing high school sports and at his age (11), he needs to get ready." Her kids will go to a competitive high school, similar to the one my kids will go to, and according to her, this is just what it takes today. The varsity baseball team is a tough team to make nowadays. Spots are reserved for kids years in advanced and often kids as young as 6th grade basically, know if they're going to have a shot at making the team. Her son is on all the right teams to nab a spot on the freshman team in 3 years, but he needs to keep improving...thus the private coaches. </div><div><br /></div><div>When did this happen? Is it like this every where? Doesn't this kind of pressure sort of suck the joy right out sports? Aren't kids supposed to be participating in activities they are passionate about just to explore? Don't they have years to master this stuff? And there's another side to this coin: if I don't do this for my kid, do I send some sort of mixed message to the coach/teacher that she's not committed to dance? Do I limit her potential for future casting? Do I hurt her future with my glib email deletion habits? Literally, I was the only parent in a cast of 9 who dismissed this whole thing. </div><div><br /></div><div>So, tomorrow night, La Nina will be evaluated for placement in this ballet academy. Semi-private lessons are based on skill, not age, so may be she'll be with friends, may be not. (Her interest will drop considerably if she's not with her friends.) And I may let her do this or I may not. I'm still just a little shocked we've gotten to this point and that I've got a lot of company in the place where I am. </div>One Lucky Momhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05746848519653479448noreply@blogger.com2