Family Dinner Conversation

So, we're eating dinner last night and I ask La Nina how her day at school was.  Normally, she simply answers "good" and we move on.  Last night she had quite a tale to tell.

"Mom, Boy A was sent to the office and didn't come back because he said a bad word."  

"Really?" I said. 

"Yeah, I heard him say it and the teacher told me to tell her and she promised I wouldn't get in trouble so I whispered it in her ear and then Boy A went to the office for the rest of the day," she said.  

"Oh?" I said.  Then like a fool I asked, "What did he say?"  

"The F-word," La Nina answered.  

Normally,  I assume the f-word was fart.  She often refers to 'stupid' as the s-word and 'hate' as the h-word, so I know her list of bad words is very short.  But given the story of someone going to the office for untold hours, I had a bad feeling about this conversation and I had to know.  

As casually as possible, I asked, "What's the f-word?"  

Between bites of her chicken she said it, the grand kahuna of all curse words, followed by, "it's not really THAT bad of a word." 

I managed to calmly say,  "Yes, it is THAT bad of a word and I don't ever want to hear it from your mouth again."  

Now...this leaves me with a dilemma.  La Nina knows 'the word'.  Someone in her class used 'the word'.   She could use 'the word' at any given moment.  The Magster was all ears during our conversation, she knows 'the word' too.  (In fact, I almost expect the Magster to use it by Friday.)

After the kids went to bed, I realized I was woefully unprepared for new era of parenting.   So, I started off looking on line for suggestions dealing with this issue.  Every suggestion was limit television, monitor their music and watch your own mouth.  She doesn't watch anything but Disney and Noggin, her music tends to be High School Musical, Hannah Montana and Jonas Brothers--no f-bombs there.  And I can honestly say she has never heard that word from my mouth or the Dads.  SO-- then I read how to handle it.  After explaining that it's bad (did that), and clarifying the expectations (did that too.), the experts basically say eliminate the source.  I can't eliminate school....so what to do? 

So today, while at the grocery store, I looked for something to nip this little bomb in the bud.  I looked for a good old fashion bar of soap to have on hand in case a need arises.  Alas, the soap seemed to have so many chemicals in it and more than one friend warned me soap doesn't taste bad enough to be a deterrent, so I passed.  I next wandered over to the spice section for some Tobasco.  I know one friend who has used that, but she used it so many times,  her kids acquired a taste for spicy food.  So, I settled on a good old fashion home remedy...castor oil.  A naturally, occurring plant extract, full of omega-3, a mild laxative and safe for children in small doses.   The good news the stuff will last forever too. According to the expiration date, it's good until 2017, the same year La Nina gets her driver's permit.

But I've been researching on line tonight, it says castor oil doesn't taste bad.  I'm so disappointed.  I need to have something really awful tasting around her now, and my one idea is supposedly odorless and tasteless...and you know, I'm not really willing to find out.  So, I turn to you, my blog readers.  Any suggestions for curbing the potential foul-mouthed five year old?