Something about September 11

Like most Americans, I can tell you exactly where I was when I heard about the tragedies at the World Trade Center 4 years ago today. I was in my bedroom and had just returned from an early morning run.

When I left to go running, the news was just breaking that a plane had hit the World Trade Center Tower. I remember thinking, "This will still be news when I get home." So, I left and ran a few miles. After I finished my run, I walked into the bedroom and noticed my husband had not moved. Literally, he was sitting in the same exact position on the end of the bed and he had the strangest look on his face. I think I said, "Are you still watching that plane crash?" And he said, "We're under attack." And with that, I joined his vigil. I stood in the same spot for about 4 hours and watched in horror as the terrorist's plan unfolded on Live TV. I couldn't move. I couldn't sit down. I just stood and watched in horror as the graceful towers collasped. It was the beginning of a very long and sorrowful day, a day that is part of our collective national psyche.

But the date of September 11, also always reminds me of something else. On September 10, 2001, we sent our completed Dossier to my agency and began the real wait for La Nina. The events are totally tied in my mind: great joy and great sorrow all mixed into one. I remember wondering what impact a war would have on our now impending (by one day) international adoption. In my mind, I knew intuitively we were going to war with someone over the happenings in New York City, I just hoped it wasn't China..irrational yes, but trust me, when you are adopting, you get a little paranoid about world events. Of course, the answer was none...but I remember worrying about it that Tuesday morning those glittering buildings fell. We waited 14.5 months after September 10 to receive word of our little girl waiting in China, but for me, every September 11th marks the beginning of that wait.

Last year, yet another adoption milestone happened at about this time: We received our referral for the Magster, ending a 6 month wait. For the record, we got "the call" on September 13, pictures of our angel came the next day. For some reason, we received our referral about a week after every other agency in the world (truly, the world) and that was a LONG week. I remember so clearly not wanting to leave the phone during those expectant days. The Dad and I spoke to each other at least once an hour all day, every day during that week, "Have you heard anything?...Have you heard? Has anyone heard anyting?". The answer were always the same: No word. Considering that our wait for Maggie was 8.5 months shorter than our wait for La Nina, I probably shouldn't have been so stressed out by an extra week, but to put it bluntly, that week sucked. Talk about some false labor!

At about 11AM on September 13, 2004, my office phone displayed the phone number of our agency and I let out a whoop of joy. I was the lucky person who took the referral call for Maggie, only fair since Dad took the call for La Nina. My hands shook as I took down the information: her name, age, height, weight, birth date and personality traits. I remember our agency faxed us an information sheet and a photo of her in shadow form taunted us all night long. The next day, I missed a morning of work and kept La Nina home from school so we could be together as a family when we first saw the face of our second daughter. I remember the joy of finally having a tangible image to cling to as I waited, and the pain of knowing I would miss her first birthday. Oh what a rollercoaster adoption can be.

So, while my heart goes out to the thousands of families who lost loved ones on this day 4 years ago, life does continue despite the great loss. And in the face of great tragedy, joy is possible and miracles still happen every day.