Mommy's Bad Morning

I was alone with the girls this morning. The Dad was on one of his rare business trips. The following events transpired between 7am and 9am.

7am- Upon awakening, La Nina realized her sister was enjoying the Wiggles which meant she had missed her current favorite show: Hi-5. Tears.

7:15am- La Nina fed up with the Aussies changes the station during "Fruit Salad" in order to catch the last part of Miss Spider. The Magster is devastated. Tears.

7:20am- I threaten to turn off television..The Wiggles end. I put on Diego as a compromise...all is well.

7:30am- For some reason, Maggie curls into the fetal position on her bed and refuses to get dressed. At the same time, her sister, clad in a ball gown, is laying in the hall sobbing because I refused to let her wear makeup to school.

7:45am- After I prepared the breakfasts according to the girls' requests, they told me their meals were "disgusting" and they refused to eat.

7:46am- I told both girls I'm not a short order cook and they better eat, 'cuz this was all they were getting. The Magster made a plea for a cookie, I glared at her. She ate her waffle. La Nina ate some canned pear and grumbled more about the disgustingness of cereal.

8:15am- Face washing time. Both girls refuse to cooperate and scream that washing faces is not necessary. I advise them it is necessary, pin their bodies between my legs and wash their faces. Both girls beg for their father to return. I tell them he can't get home quick enough for me either.

8:30am- Maggie is in pants. La Nina's in her ball gown and I'm in a skirt. La Nina tells Maggie that she is a "Man" because she's wearing pants. This causes the Magster to dissolve into tears. Just as I get her settled down, La Nina runs passed us and says, "MAN". More tears. I advise La Nina she is on thin ice, and send the girls to get in the car.

8:35am- There are more 'Man' comments, more tears, a convulted, yet passionate, 'Sticks and Stones' statement, and I finally forbid the kids from speaking in the van. We begin driving to school, but I stop the car every time a word (which is usually "Man") is uttered. Finally, the kids figure out I'm serious, and they stop speaking. I have 5 minutes of peace. Not enough.

8:55am- We arrive at the school. I advise the girls to get out of their seats, but La Nina shrugs her shoulders. I ask her what's wrong, I get a shrug. Then she begins waving her hands. Finally, I tell her it's okay to talk and she tells me I told her she couldn't talk. I ask her about the hands...sign language, she answers. OK. Then she tells me she doesn't like the jacket we brought and wants a different one that's at home.

8:56am- I tell her to get out of her car seat.

9:00am- I get back in the van after signing the girls into their classes. I'm exhausted. Time to go to work. What a way to start a day.